Warriors Comedy Spree
by Juri-Chan of WishClan
Summary: A bunch of stories that are very random and pretty funny. R&R, please! If you have any suggestions on stories for this fanfic, please tell me in a review! Thanks!
1. Chapter 1: Cloudtail

**Hello, everyone! This is my first warriors humor piece, actually this is a bunch of stories, mainly short ones, but anyway, I'm not that good at humor stories, but that still doesn't mean you shouldn't read it. R&R, please! **

**This first one is of Cloudtail meeting a very strange StarClan cat. It is very random.**

Brightheart is walking around camp, looking for Cloudtail and calling his name.

"Cloudtail, Cloudtail!" She yowls.

"BOOO, I AM A STARCLAN GHOOOST!" A voice calls from behind the nursery.

Brightheart chuckles. "Alright, Cloudtail, you got me."

"Huh?" Cloudtail steps out from behind his mate, carrying a fish. "I got you? I was just catching fish from RiverClan; don't tell anyone." He winks.

Brightheart hears a rustle from behing the nursery. She turns to see a starry white tom who looked exactly like Cloudtail but bigger and see-through.

Brightheart looks from one cat to another and shrieks. She wobbles down to the floor, her eyes white, and her legs sprawled out.

"COOL!" Cloudtail bursts. "I'VE NEVER SEEN ANY CAT DO THAT BEFORE!"

The two cats stare at each other for a very long time, until a deep dark voice crashes down to the camp. It is calling out to the StarClan cat.

"I gotsta go, dude. See ya'll later." He winks and dances up to the sky, knocking a ton of branches out of the trees above the camp. He lets out a creepy laugh, and his tongue sticks out and his eyes become crossed.

"Okaaaaay... That's one weird cat." Cloudtail mews, then walks away.

Brightheart wakes up then looks around. She whispers, "Did I... miss something?"


	2. Chapter 2:Brightpaw

**It's me again! Thanks for reading! This one's about Brightpaw when she got attacked by a dog. This one's pretty funny, I think.**

Brightpaw and Swiftpaw are at Snakerocks, back in the forest, searching for the cause of all the trouble.

"I hear something." Brightpaw whispers to Swiftpaw, who is just ahead of her, sniffing.

"Ah, don't worry, Brightpaw! I'm sure this'll all pay off when we're warriors!" Swiftpaw assures.

Brightpaw nods hesitantly, then keeps on walking.

The pair of apprentices hear a small, high-pitched barking. Brightpaw turns her head to the side in confusion. They hear a pitter-patter on the ground, coming closer to them.

Brightpaw couldn't believe what she was seeing. It was a tiny dog, probably a pup. She laughs good-heartedly.

"I could shred that thing in two seconds!" Swiftpaw bragged, laughing. He stopped almost at once and unsheathed his claws, lunging for the dog.

The little puppy raises it's leg high towards Swiftpaw.

_What kind of attack is that?_ Brightpaw wonders. She stares at it, then wrinkles her nose in disgust. Now they know.

Swiftpaw's eyes were shut with the dog's "business" on him, his nose wrinkled and his mouth letting out a horrible choking sound. He falls to the ground, his legs up in the air.

"Swiftpaw, no!" Brightpaw yowls. She rushes over to her friend in agony. He was dead.

Brightpaw turns around and stares at the tiny dog in fear. He sits, though not on the ground. Brightpaw's eyes widen.

BACK IN THUNDERCLAN CAMP

Graystripe and Fireheart are eating, when all of a sudden, a small explosion goes off, coming from Snakerocks. It is followed by a tiny scream. The warriors look at each other, then shrug.


	3. Chapter 3: Warriors Interview

Into the Wild

Interview

Disclaimer: The "Warriors" series by Erin Hunter is NOT owned by me. I am just writing the story, peoples.

Hello, everyone! My name is Bramblestar, and I am the leader of FrostClan! I am visiting the famous ThunderClan! I will be interviewing Firepaw, Bluestar, Sandpaw, Graypaw, and Tigerclaw! I'm so pumped!

Firepaw

Me: Hello, Firepaw! It's nice to meet the original ThunderClan warrior!

Firepaw: Thanks, Bramblestar! It's nice to be here!

Q/ How did it feel coming into the forest?

A/ That crazy furball Graypaw almost made me wet myself...

Q/ How often do you regret going into ThunderClan?

A/ Every single mo-- ahem, ahem Never-- never! I'm loyal!

Q/ Did you ever ask out Spottedleaf?

A/ Yes, and when I did, she pelted a huge clump of deathberries at me.

Me: That was a great and weird interview! Do you know where Bluestar is?

Firepaw: Thanks, and Bluestar's in her den, DUH!

Bluestar

Me: Greetings, Bluestar! It's great to interview a fellow leader!

Bluestar: Thank you. Let's get started.

Q/ How does it feel, being a Clan leader?

A/ It sucks.

Q/ What did you do when you heard the prophecy?

A/ I did flips and started to yowl, what do you think?

Q/ Do you actually get nine lives?

A/ No, you actually die during the ceremony, and you come back as a visible ghost and everyone thinks you're alive.

Me: Thanks for that... Um, I'm gonna move on. Know where Sandpaw is?

Bluestar: yup. And, she's at the heap of crowfood.

Sandpaw

Me: Hey, Sandpaw! Thanks for letting me interview you!

Sandpaw: No prob!

Q/ Did you actually tease Firepaw because you LIKE him?

A/ N-No. No. Plus, Dustpaw would be totally jealous!

Q/ How do you warriors get clean, rolling around in crap all day?

A/ We don't! Isn't it lovely?

Q/ Is what Firepaw said about Spottedleaf true?

A/ No, it was just a dream.

Me: Um, yeah. Very polite answer on question two... heh heh. thanks.

Sandpaw: Yuppers! Graypaw is smooching with someone in the corner...

Graypaw

Me: Hiya! Ready for the interview?

Graypaw: Yeah, let's go!

Q/Why did you decide to befriend a kittypet?

A/ I dunno. For kicks?

Q/ Did you like all the schemes you and Firepaw did?

A/ Yesss!

Q/ As a follow-up question to number 2, were you the one who came up with the schemes?

A/ No! It was all Firepaw! Don't hurt me, Mommy!

Me: Yeah, thanks... heh heh huh...

Graypaw: yup! Do you want a go?

Me: Of what?

Graypaw: puckers up

Tigerclaw

Me: Um, hi! Should we get started?

Tigerclaw: Sure, whatever.

Q/ Is the blood in the stories real?

A/ Yeah, it's real! Real ketchup!

Q/ What's ketchup?

A/ I dunno. I think it's good with french fries.

Q/ Are you really a murderer?

A/ You wanna find out?

Me: Thanks, weir-- I mean, buddy!

Tigerclaw: sure thing.

NOTE: Thanks for reading. I'm not really sure if I'll be doing more of these, but tell me if you want more. Thanks!


	4. Chapter 4: Twoleg Confusion

Warriors: Comedy Spree

Twoleg Confusion

"Die, Scourge! We'll send you back from where you came from! RAWR!" Yowled Firestar.

"Not unless you die first, weakling!" Growled Scourge.

Scourge raised a paw with claws painted dark red with blood. He snarled, then striked slowly, screaming "ROOOOOAR!", just like he was in slow motion.

"Wait, wait! Stop! Cut! Could we hurry this up, please?" Firestar asked.

"Why, what's wrong?" Scourge mewled.

"You know, being a star and everything," Firestar began, "I have a meeting. We're discussing french fries."

"Ooh, really? I gotta go!" Scourge squeaked. The whole set became silent. Scourge growled. "What?"

Firestar began to crack up.

"Shut up." He murmured. "Wait, what are french fries?"

Firestar settled down. "I don't really know."

"ACTION!" Some random director yelled. The two cats continued fighting.

"Cut, cut! Stop!" Scourge screamed. "This is gonna be bothering me. I'll be in my trailer."


	5. Chapter 5: Cats Up!

Warriors Comedy Spree

Cats Up!

It was a bright and sunny day in ThunderClan. Firestar was done dismissing the dawn patrols.

Firestar padded over to Sandstorm. "You know, when I was a kittypet, my Twolegs would always talk about catsup."

"Um, catsup?" Sandstorm repeated.

"Yeah. They would eat it with these long, yellow things. I tried some when they weren't looking, and it was tangy, sour, and good."

Meanwhile, while Firestar was chatting about catsup, two apprentices overheard them. "Hey, let's have a prank." A tabby tom said.

"What is it, Bramblepaw?" A tabby she-cat asked.

"Every time Firestar says catsup, let's jump!" Bramblepaw said. "Sound good, Tawnypaw?"

Tawnypaw gave him a look of doubt. "Why?"

"For fun, I guess."

"Fine."

Bramblepaw spotted Firestar; he was leaving the camp with a smile.

Bramlepaw jumped up on the Highrock. "Attention, ThunderClan! I have a prank!" Bramblepaw called.

The whole Clan "oohed" and stared up at him.

"So, what do we do?" A voice called out.

"We jump every time Firestar says catsup!"

The clearing became silent, and Bramblepaw was embarrassed.

"That is... the BEST IDEA EVER!" Graystripe yowled.

The Clan cheered. "Don't worry. I have acute hearing, we all do! Wait-- I hear him coming!" Bramblepaw shouted.

Firestar was coming back to camp with anger in his chest. "Dumb catsup--" The ground shook. "What the? Anyway... I can't believe Twolegs don't grow catsup--" Another quake.

Firestar rushed to his camp, only to see his clanmates moaning.

"What happened? I was talking about catsup--" He began. The whole camp shook. One cat laughed almost to death.

"Oh, StarClan, that's GOOD!"

-later that day-

"Well, Firestar, Bramblepaw's little stunt hurt everyone. We can't battle for a moon!" Cinderpelt sighed.

"Oh, great! We have a fight with ShadowClan tomorrow!" dramatic music


	6. Chapter 6: Feathertail's Death

Hi again! So sorry for the really slow update! But, here's another chapter for my fans!

Chapter 6

Feathertail's Death

The cave was dark, and all she smelled was fear. She could tell Sharptooth was coming. Feathertail cuddled close next to Crowpaw, ignoring the betrayed stare from Stormfur.

Suddenly, a shadow traveled on the cave's stone floor. When she looked up, it was this huge mountain lion. She knew it right away. This had to be Sharptooth.

She let out a strange whimper at the sight of him, while the rest of the Tribe was quiet. She noticed most of the cats giving her strange looks. She even saw Sharptooth trying to hold back laughter.

She flushed with embarrassment. In the back of the cave, someone shouted "HA!" then stayed quiet.

Suddenly, the whole cave burst out in laughter. It lasted for about 10 minutes, then it ebbed and Stoneteller mewed, "Alright, no, seriously. Get him." with one last chuckle.

The whole cave got serious, and Sharptooth's teeth bared, threatening the whole Tribe. Feathertail climbed a tall rock, way higher than where Sharptooth stood. Stormfur protested her doing this. She flew down at Sharptooth in a karate stance, with her back leg outstretched and her front paws high above her head.

Instantly she fell on top of Sharptooth, which killed him. However, she felt serious pain shooting from all over her body.

Crowpaw and Stormfur rushed up to her. "Feathertail, no!" Crowpaw shrieked.

"Feathertail, don't go!" Stormfur mewed.

From under her, randomly Sharptooth somehow growled, "Yeah, Feathertail, don't go!" Then he fell limp again.

"Crowpaw..." She rasped.

"Yes?" Crowpaw cried.

"You... You have a HUGE spider on your shoulder." She shouted. Feathertail then fell dead.

Crowpaw shrieked; the spider was about the size of his head. It wouldn't come off!

Stormfur laughed. "It looks like you have two heads, but you're a mutant!"

The whole Tribe started to crack up again.

Stoneteller stopped. "Alright, this Tribe is starting to smell bad. Will someone help me throw these bodies in the stream?"

"Can't we bury her?" Crowpaw pleaded.

"Fine... But Sharptooth we're gonna eat for dinnah!! Yah!" He shouted and then the whole Clan lit up and forgot what just happened.

In the late night sky, Crowpaw was staring up at Silverpelt. He was munching on some of Sharptooth's legs. He saw Feathertail's face in the sky.

The wind whispered to him, "I wish I could've ate some. Could you throw your remaining piece of leg up here? It'll just float up, trust me."

Crowpaw, dazed, threw it up. However, it crumbled down a dirt wall and he pouted. Then laughter came from the cave and Crowpaw found cats hysterically laughing at him, their tails pointing at him.

He sighed. "Feathertail, you're such a handful."


End file.
